Motherhood is weird, messy, wonderful, and everything in between.
Some people have painful memories and wounds from their relationship with their mothers. Some people have abiding joy when they think of their mothers. Some people long to become a mother, and are still waiting. Some people choose to mother in other ways – through being teachers, aunts, neighbors.
I have had a myriad of experiences as a mother.
I have the joy of raising my three children. Some moments with them are beautiful and fun. Other moments I want to cry and yank my hair out. Motherhood brings out the best in me, as well as the worst. Some days I feel like I’m in the Mom Zone, doing a great job of parenting. Other days it’s a hot mess and I completely fail.
I also have the pain of losing two children through early-pregnancy miscarriages. It is painful to never hold or know these two babies. But oh how my mother’s heart holds them with such deep love.
I’m trying my best as a mother. I’m trying my best to love and cherish and nurture my children. But I’m also being schooled by motherhood. It’s the place where I am still learning and stumbling. Ultimately, I believe that motherhood is a gift I have been given. I don’t get to control how it all goes. But I do get to learn how to steward it the best that I possibly can. And as I do, my heart is stretched and my love is refined.
I embrace the laughter and the tears. I embrace the beautiful moments and the awful moments. In both the pain and the joy, I embrace motherhood.